This Is for You

Hi, you.

I am glad that you are here with me now.


I am listening to Sunday Roast by Courtney Barnett.

I listened to part of the album Tell Me How You Realy Feel... just before.

I like it a lot. I probably like all of her songs, at least a little. I like Courtney Barnett as an artist and person.

Kurt.

Nothing hurts... Sometimes a lot.

I drank two white wines in the past few hours, a sweet and a dry.

I am a little ashamed. I want to drink all the wine.

I keep thinking of buying coconut rum. My mom bought some about a month ago. I drank most of it.

I was just reading some Edward Gorey.

I am anxious, waiting for my mother and her cousin to get back to this house... any second.

Mom got me a taco from Torchy's.

Patrick texted me, asking if I want a taco.

I guess Mom's phone died.

I requested a migas taco.

We walked and drove around Bastrop...

I felt anxious about myself and what I should do, alone in this house... again today.

I feel better.

Often I tell myself I don't care. About whatever or everything.

Oh yeah, I want to take a walk now.

B right b ack. I will probably continue this soon after I get back from myy walk, if I really go...

Okay, now.


That was fun.

Mom, Tiff, and I just walked for at least 30 minutes, the usual, Sanders Estates.

It was pretty dark.

I walked Cutting Horse alone.

I paused near 1441.

There was a sliver of moon shine in ...

I love that experience.

I talked to myself... almost all the time.

I almost cried.

I remembered 'What is best in life?'

I guess I prefer to start sentences with the letter or word 'I'


Of course, I know that I could have made better decisions.

I decide to stop thinking, then do whatever feels good enough

at the moment.

Help Your Self by Courtney Barnett is on now.

Walking on Cutting Horse, I thought that alcohol makes me happy.

Obviously. But I probably have a problem...

Only occasionally though, since I have almost no money.


I am sure that I should just go to sleep, in a few minutes.

Floss, brush.

I should read instead of typing this.

There are several works I know I should read.

Sleep is the best for me now I am sure.

I have heard/read that Sleeping is a problem for millions, maybe billions of humans.


It is Strange that it seems that

Tiffany staying at this house too

Has had a profound impact on me.


Mom just discovered I drank most of the wine.

I was embarrassed and awkward for a few seconds.

She called me a Lush... mostly playfully, jokily I guess.


I have to stop...

So many times, I have thought, I just want to do nothing... except think...

then, I think, I will just do what is well-thought-out, reasonable, responsible, necessary, best for me...

But I have almost never done that.


Okay

Good bye

now

!