Walking

All I want is honesty.

Hi. I am in the business center at my apartments. I got out of bed about 20 minutes ago.

About 9 last night I took a walk around my hood. I listened to They Might Be Giants Rdio. I was bursting with energy. I speed walked. I started to wave and say Hi or Hello to every passing car. I passed a guy sitting at a bustop. I said Good Evening in a low voice. I did not detect a response. It is too cold in here.

I tried to walk funnily, to put on a show for the people driving by. I gave some thumbs up. skipped for under a minute, till I was too tired to. I wondered if I was totally altering my personality for good. I had fun. The exercise was good for me. I felt like I was high on something. Just my own body and mind and life.

I listened to music really loud after I was back in the apartment. I turned off the AC and opened the balcony door. Ween and Pixies and Neutral Milk Hotel. I said loudly, Saturday night, and, I have chairs, wondering if someone could hear me.

I thought of myself as having a one-person party.

Pat and Bridget arrived shortly after.

Within ten minutes he asked if I wanted to play a game. I reacted negatively then said Yes.

We played Small World, and I did poorly. Pat beat Bridget by 5.

I got tired. Pat ordered Papa John's. I ate 2 or 3 slices.

He got root beer. I like root beer, but I don't want to kill myself any further with soda.

A few weeks or months ago, we had some cream soda, and a few times I put some in my mouth to taste it, then I spit it out.


About 1 am, I went for a walk with my phone and ear buds.

I walked east on the north side of Stassney. I was a little scared of violent homeless people and crazed youths. I did not notice any.

I passed two daycares.

I walked slowly. I had my arms crossed for a long time. I wanted to look hungry and pitiful. Or maybe I just was.





The moon was about 75%.

I looked at it every SO often.

I turned right on Congress. I like the large undeveloped area. The moon and trees and clouds were beautiful. I felt weird. I felt that everything was empty and meaningless. I thought that Meaning means nothing. I walked by an open taco truck. Two people sat at a picnic table talking. I thought of asking for food for free, politely begging. I thought, Yo soy nada. Tengo nada. Then I wondered how to say I feel nothing in Spanish.



I began to walk with arms behind my back and more energy. I turned right on Eberhart. I played Igorrr's Nostril on Youtube.com and listened with ear buds in my ears.

I liked it a lot. I thought of Aaron and if he would like it. I laughed a little.

My attention to and and enthusiasm for the music waned. In front of the Arts was a man and a truck and a dog. I looked at the light colored dog and said Pretty dog. I passed the man seconds later, looked at him, and said Good Evening. He said something quietly. He was shorter, older, and had a little dark mustache.


I got back about 3:30 am.


I listened to ASMR a little. I fell asleep...


Goodbye for now