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I'm tired. I have barely been awake for 12 hours. Kit and I went on a bike ride for less than ten miles, about an hour. I'm listening to Colour Green. It's deep. I listened to Tonight and looked at the Gustav Klimt calendar and cryed a little. "Calendar" is a nice word. Penelope-of Montreal. I wanted to go outside so I started to get the mail, and I thought of taking out the trash, then I got excited about throwing away the cookie cake that Kit brought today. After I threw it away, I thought of how to explain why to Kit. I want to spare us the physical trauma of eating it. We'll eat way too much junk anyway. I imagined seeing Ashley. I wanted to make myself feel more than I usually feel. I sang in my head, I see you coming for me - I know I am not anywhere - Can I speak without moving? - Can I speak without thinking? - How strange the waves of color seem - They are known by what we make of them - They are what they are. Now I want to add "without us" to the end.

How do we describe something separate from us? How do we know anything

Tears forming. I hope I make Aaron proud by following this wondering. I masturbated to Andrea's profile picture. It felt really good. It felt like she was looking back at me. She looks displeased or something.

Thursday, Kimberley asked for my help tying string to chalk. I held the chalk as she tied. Her fingers bumped and brushed mine. She asked me to rotate the chalk and I did. I wonder if she wanted to touch me. I felt weird when I walked away. There was a young tall blonde tan girl at Howson. She checked out a Murakami book from me. I looked at her eyes when I told her the due date. She sat at a table. She was with a shorter paler girl, maybe her sister. Both were (or are, I hope they're still alive) pretty. She checked out something else from me later. I glanced at her and the other a few times. I thought I should say something to her, at least about Murakami, even though I know almost nothing about him. I hoped my coworkers did not think I was staring at them, lusting. She could have been younger than 17. That would be great.

I looked at the Conspiracy set for a while. I am well set in the idea that my bros and I will draft it, wasting money and, more upsetting, time. I looked at Gillian Jacobs online (I wonder how old she is. Barely older than me I think). Dan Croll is twenty-four. He was twenty two when he debuted his music. Hopefully I can use the words I wrote these many years and create something good.

I always do. Doing suff. So, I am ginna ebbe be be bne ba bbe      edddddddd